Strangers in a Strange Land – Part II

When I left off last episode, we were in Budva. It was here that we rented a car and became free to explore Montenegro on our own terms.

Montenegro

Orts

Here’s a quick post as a I work on a rather lengthy sequel to my Montenegrin epic.

"But...I'm thirsty".

Yeah, I ate it.

M:”Put down a layer of oatmeal and spoon a can of coconut cream over it and I guess you’ve got yourself a pie”
Me (poutily): “No, no you don’t. I thought it was fucking graham cracker crust…I love graham cracker crust”.
M:“I made mine into the shape of a piece of pie…it tastes better that way”.
Me (grudgingly):“It tastes pretty good actually…but it’s still not fucking right”.

Open Letter to Guy Using the Toaster at Cambridge this Morning

Dear Guy Using the Toaster at Cambridge this Morning,

Do you mind if I call you Asshat? No? Good. Well, Asshat, those toasters are designed to handle a pretty significant throughput of bread. The idea is that once your bread is loaded into it, others (most importantly, me) can then put their bread into it. If you put your bread into it then stand directly in front of the thing with your crotch pressed up against the tray shelf, no one else can put their fucking bread in. Then we all have to wait for your bread to be done, watch you take it out zombie-slow, drop your butter packet on the floor, bend down to pick it up like you’re in an action scene from Kung Fu, and chat to your fucking idiot friend about how clumsy you are before you finally get the fuck out of the way.

Maybe when that polite Canadian contractor said “excuse me” you could have stood back. Failing that, you could have taken the hint as he tried to reach past you with bread in hand. Instead, you stood there with that stupid ass, oblivious, newbie smile on your stupid ass face making stupid ass small talk with your stupid ass friend. Stupid ass.

Regards,

Kafoodie

Good Gravy Man, Pull Yourself Together!

I give up.

My experience in the steam line at the Lux tonight:
Me:”Roast beef, please”.
1st serving guy puts roast beef on my plate. Cool.
I hand my plate to the 2nd serving guy.
Me: “Corn please”
2nd serving guy puts corn on my plate. Two for two. Awesome.
Me:”And some gravy on the beef, please”.
2nd serving guy starts to scoop up some Brussels sprouts.
Me:”No Brussels sprouts, just some gravy on the beef please”
2nd serving guy looks at me and starts to scoop up Brussels sprouts again.
Me (pointing at the gravy):”No, just some gravy on the beef, please”.
2nd serving guy(in soto voce with a hint of confusion):“Gravy?”
Me:”Yes, some gravy on the beef please”.
2nd serving guy proceeds to dump gravy onto my corn.
Me:”Thanks”

Covering One’s Ass

J, M and I went to Cambridge on Wednesday night for dinner. We ate stuff.

Get Around, Get Around, I Get Around…

After getting our hopes and dreams dashed by thinking that we had found a reliably better than not good DFAC, we’ve started eating each meal somewhere different again. Of course, there’s a limit to how infrequent you can make your revisits given that there’s only seven DFACS to choose from. We did, however, manage to eat at six of them in the last three days. Welcome to a whirlwind tour of KAF DFAC cuisine.

Some Divine Intervention and A Hipster Invasion

We had our standard lunch at the Northline and then opted for the IH for dinner. Both venues were the site of semi-miraculous events. Bear in mind that I consider having the right forms to renew my KAF pass on my first visit to badging (despite the ever changing regs) to be irrefutable proof of the existence of Horus so I may be setting the miracle bar kinda low.

Icarus and Other Tales

I knew it was too good to last. J, M, D and I tempted fate and went to Monti for the third dinner in a row last night. Third time’s the charm…my ass.