I’ve uncovered what is probably the biggest KAF DFAC scandal of the year!!!! But first, how about some insignificant nonsense?
I made fun of Monti’s little kid chairs quite a while back so I would be remiss if I didn’t point out that they were replaced a while ago. They now have the most comfortable chairs of any of the DFACs. Awesome improvement, Monti! Now can you do something about the fucking wind tunnel?
Everyone who’s ever eaten there will know what I’m talking about. As you open the door at the back into the area where the garbage bins are, you are met with gale force winds. They blow all the detritus off of your plate…empty water bottles, cups, napkins, plates. Anything you aren’t actually holding onto flies into the poor sap behind you. What the fuck Monti?
He’s a Big Kid Now
Everyone please join me in congratulating J on moving up to a sippy cup. Maybe now he won’t spill his goddamn coffee all over my SUV.
Do You Know:
That if you’re trying to take a picture of plastic flapping out of the Monti’s wind tunnel with your IPod as you walk and hold onto the shit on your tray and you have very little hand/eye coordination and an even more inept memory, there is a very real risk that you will put your IPod onto your tray and dump the whole lot into the garbage bin realizing your mistake just a second too late and have to dig through a bunch of disgusting leftovers to get your IPod back? I do.
My Moment of Zen
Back to The News
Has anyone else noticed that pie slices at the Monti and IH seem smaller than they used to be? I thought it may have just been a symptom of my ever increasing gluttony but, thanks to my exceptional skills as an investigative journalist, I’ve uncovered a scandalous plot. First came the dessert guards, presumably to control our consumption of sweets…now we have Pie-gate!
As exhibit one, I enter a picture I took at IH for a post back in July 2011. Exhibit two, is a picture I took at the Monti a few days ago, in July 2012. One can clearly see that the earlier pie is cut into 8 generously proportioned pieces while the latter pie is divided into 10 miserly bits that make a mockery of the term “serving”. I’m really not sure what to do with this explosive information…other than take two pieces of pie from now on.
For those of you having trouble wrapping your mind around this high level math, I’ve created a handy Pie Pie Chart which, I think, explains things fairly well.
I’m glad I have nothing important to worry about.
“We’re not gonna take it. No, we ain’t gonna take it”. – Dee Snider .
Sorry Dee, I think we are pretty much going to have to take it.
“I don’t want to spend my life not having good food going into my pie hole. That hole was made for pies.” – Paula Deen